Mindfulness for Parents

How Practicing Mindfulness Can Make You A ‘Yes’ Woman Or Man

Have you ever had a time where you learned some new information but the “how” of it takes a while to really figure out? You’re not alone. Today I’m sharing an example of how understanding mindfulness and how it can improve your relationships isn’t enough and how it really is a practice to see change in your life.

I recently had the opportunity to use my mindfulness practice to become a ‘Yes’ Woman with my daughter. Let me explain. My children had a book fair at their school, and my daughter came home all excited to share that she wanted to spend $36 of her allowance at the book fair. $36!!!

Of course, my immediate reaction was to try to persuade her that it was too much to spend and to remind her that she had been saving her allowance for months to help pay for the dog she wants to get in a few years (I mean, the poor girl only gets $2 a week.). I wanted to protect her from being disappointed after the newness of the books wears off and she realizes she’s out of the money she’s been saving for the dog she wants so badly.

Flipping the ‘No’ to ‘Yes’

But, I caught myself, and gave myself that pause that exists between an action and your reaction to it. The one that gets better when you learn to be more mindful and consistently practice it.

I caught myself from saying ‘no’, being negative and creating what could have been an argument between us about whether I would allow her to use her own money to purchase what she wants rather than letting her feel empowered and independent to make her own purchase decisions.

For a split second, I took a moment to think back to an interview I had seen with Shonda Rhimes speaking about her book, Year of Yes, where she did something similar with her kids and others in her life and spent a year saying ‘yes’. She came to understand how the power of ‘yes’ can transform your life and relationships. It’s amazing stuff. She even discusses it in a wonderful TED Talk.

So after I gave myself that mindful moment, I was able to become a ‘yes woman’ with my daughter and it instantly changed her energy and our conversation. The next day, she got her books, she was happy as a clam, and I was the recipient of many hugs, both for letting her buy the books and because she was following the instructions from the Trolls books she bought about it being hug time. I shared the story in a bit more detail during a live broadcast on my Facebook page, check out the video below to hear me tell the story.

 

And, if you want to really connect with your kids and  turn your conversations to ones where there’s less friction and ‘no’ and more ‘yes’, I highly recommend learning and practicing mindfulness to help with building your parenting toolkit of skills. In no time, you, too, could be the recipient of many hugs. 

Mindfulness and More Time

So tell me, was it helpful to hear from another mom share how you can turn those power struggle conversations around and become a ‘yes’ woman or man? Care to share your strategies for flipping around some of those ‘no’s’ into ‘yes’ with your kids? Let us know in the comments below.

P.S. If you’re wondering how to start with a mindfulness practice, click here to get my help learning mindfulness in less than 10 minutes per day.

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